就这样吗?

I'm getting tired and sick of it too.

After all these years, and only to realize that it means only that much. Must it be measured by terms of give and receive? How much is considered enough? I'm baffled.

The words hurled that night really hurt. Not responding does not equate that I approve of what was said, but knowing that responding will end everything immediately.

我好不甘心. 就这样失去一切.